WHY

[Colliemom]

Why, has become the main word in my thughts these days. As I sit here this winter, I am slowly getting tired of cold and snow. My mind starts to think. It thinks about winter, spring, the summer to come, my future, my life both past, present and hopefully future. And as I ponder it all, I wonder why. If I am getting, for the first time in my life, to a pont where winter i beginning to drag, why am I staying here? Why am I not down someplace where it's warmer, the grass is green (hopefully) and there is no snow or cold. If there is such a place this wnter

I look at my life. I'm single, I have no family other than 4 cousins whom I'm not in contact with that much. I have a few friends, but none whom I can call up and say "hey, want to...: They are married with their own doings etc. So why do I stay here? I think back on all the trips my parents and I went on over the years we were together, the places we went, the thngs we saw, the fun times we had. Why am I not doing that now? True, I have had to work in summers in order to persay live. Unfortunately it takes money to live as we all know. But now that I am at the age where I can start my SS, I'm looking at it differently. And with my boss leaving and who knows who the new one will be, perhaps work won't be so much fun or maybe no work at all. And I dream of that open road. So why I am waiting? There is nothng holding me back. I am free like a bird to fly off where I please and only be grounded within my limitations (those of you who read The Shack, probablly recall that). I have a nice home, and almost 4 acres of lovely ground here. But why do I keep it? It's too big for me, it requires work and expense to keep up. I pay for gas to keep me warm, electric to give me light and cable TV for which I rarely look at. Why? I have income, income pays my bills. Why do I use my ilncome to pay my bills when a whole beautiful country awaits me out there? Why do I pay property taxes to keep this house that I just "live" in. Is it because it's feeling of "security", fullfilling the American dream to own a house, or because that's they way it works. We are born, we live, we work, we exist, we die. Perhaps it a guilt factor. Dad wanted to move after mom died and in a way so did I. We had the land, we got the house put on it, we worked on the land, we kept after the house and he loved it here, but I always had a longing for the house we had before and it never felt like home. But he knew I would be all set when he was gone. After all he hoped for me, am I letting him down? But the neighborhood is quiet, I never see my neighbors much and I am alone anyway. Nobody ever checks on me since my next door neighbors are now gone. So why do I stay?

Why am I here? Is it the fear of the unknown? The open road calls me, the want and the urge to go, pull on me. So why do I stay put and just think about it? Maybe it's because the idea of selling everythlng and hitting that open road and just wandering is so out of the ordinary that the thought is scary. A million "if's" go through your mind. Do I have enough money to do this? If I sell my house and invest the money, will I have enough to buy another one if I decide that the roaming lifestyle isn't for me? I would need to get a different RV as my little TT wouldn't be quite big enough for extanded stays on the road. Or is it perhaps the decision having to be made as to whether I keep a "sticks and Bricks" place to come "home" to when I feel ilke it? Do I think I might get lonesome? But I can get lonesome here too. And would I miss contact with whata friends and family I have although I don't have much contact as I said? That's what the internet and phones are for.

Why do I sit here and wait for the housing market to get better? For each year I wait, I am getting older, the house is getting older. Is it time to sell and run with it? I read LJPetrlin's Blog and she has hit the nail on the head. She's going for it. Beth went for it and there are others out there who went for it or are going for it. So why do I hem and haw?

I know one thing for sure. This summer will make these decisions. This summer will be the one to see if I really want to do this. This summer will be the year I stop asking Why and starting asking Why Not.

Thanks for listening to my rambles. Just getting it out of my system I guess you could call it. Know I can always talk to my "sistah's" out there.

[mitch5252]

..

Sue, thanks for sharing all those feelings with us. I kinda know how you feel - I have many similar thoughts. However, I have George to care for. I figure if, and when I don't, your questions will become mine.

How is this summer going to make up your mind for you?

..

[mtngal]

Here's a question to follow why?......what if ?!? The possibilities are endless!

(and while you are soul searching, don't forget the years of experience you have from working in the park, you decide where you want to spend a season and I bet you will have a job!)

[Redetotry]

It sounds as though your heart has the answer and your head is just trying to confuse you. I think of a lot of the same thoughts myself and with every year that goes by I think of the song that has a line in it that says, 'dreams move on if you wait too long.' I'll be hoping you come to a decision soon it not a good feeling having ones mind in a muddle, once you take that first step I bet all will fall into place for you. All winter you have been cleaning, painting and fixing up so a lot of the work is already in progress.
I wish I could still get down to FL and look for a place to spend several months next winter. I loved the look of Blue Cypress Lake where Liz and the rest of the group have been the past week and I love to bass fish and that lake is known for it's lunkers.
Oh, just remembered a friend of mine moved to Florida a few years ago, bought a beautiful double wide in a beautiful park near Ocala and at that time all her living expenses were under $500. a month including lot rent,lawn care, taxes and utilities. She loved it and said in two weeks she had more friends than she had made in 25 years of living in a very small town in So Illinois.
Keep writing down your thoughts it helps with decisions I think.

[Acadianmom]

You have a beautiful place but I couldn't stand your winters. The few times I have been in a lot of snow I didn't like it. What are you going to do when you no longer can do all the work to keep up a place like that? I don't know that I would ever want to full-time. I like to go but I am happy to get back home too. If you could sell or rent your place until the economy gets better you could travel and hopefully find a part of the country you like. With your experience working in a park you shouldn't have any problem finding work-camping jobs.

You would like to work in the park where your boss is moving to. Wouldn't they let you have a site like they do for the work-campers so you could stay there in your trailer. I know it would be tight quarters for you and the dogs but you could go home on your days off for some space.

Martha

[Travelinana]

Sue, I was thinking 'ditto, ditto, ditto' as I read. How many of us relate to what you wrote? Probably most of us, either having made the tough decision and lived with it or like you weighing it all trying to eliminate the fear of the unknown. There are, no doubt, some who have gone back to the "security" of the rooted life, after traveling for a time. Your letter won't reach them as they have given up this kind of forum focusing instead on their decision to stay put. I have said for most of my life that I am a frustrated gypsy I didn't have the good fortune to have a mate who shared and prepared for this roving lifestyle. I could rent and probably sell my home fairly quickly living in a retirement community here in Arkansas with lots of northeners moving here. The 100,000 home they leave will buy them twice the house here if they choose so I could probably unload my house. I think my guy and I could make it fine for the few years we choose to roam but always the questions. Quite honestly there are no guarantees and no certainties except death and taxes. I would love to leave my kids something, as they have been the best...how could I be so lucky! Yet, am I guaranteeing them a little inheritance by staying put?
Ultimately we must all make these personal desisions!! Good luck to you and all who search....
Nancy

[Echo]

Sue you sound like your in the spot I was in '07'. I was living in Maine and working full time. All my pay was going towards living expenses and very little to savings. I had thought for years to go full time camping but for whatever reason hadn't made the move. My thoughts were to do it when I retired and had a TT to live in.

It took a fall at work, I injured my knee. A very small simple question from Kelly. And the thought of ? "Yeah what AM I waiting for?" to do the trick. Kelly said, "Mom why are you still sitting and waiting?". "There's nothing really holding you in Maine, no family, nothing really permanent, why not go full timing?" To tell you the truth, while I had gotten rid of so much of my stuff I just sat there! Maybe it was a little bit of fear? Maybe it was just that I was in a rut??? But Kelly's question was a turning point and the catalyst to get things started. I got rid of a bunch more stuff and rented a storage room in Camp Hill PA where my terminal was located at. The plan was to keep driving over the road and save as much as I could. I was in the process of moving stuff out of the apt and into the storage room every time I got into the terminal. Had 3/4 of it done when Kelly moved back home. We both ended up living in the truck until I had the accident. Which put some major breaks on plans. Moved to TN and rented/shared a house with the son and his then girlfriend. When the decision was made to 'break up' the house as the son and girlfriend were moving into another place and planned to get married. It was Sparkle who kicked us in the butt and helped get us jobs at the Lodge. No TT needed at that time cause the Lodge provided housing. We made the jump. Now money has been tight, as we don't have any kind of a separate income except what we work for and earn. But even tho it's tight for us, we are making it and keeping things together. Having a newer TT would help out big time.

But this summer will be the last that we work at the Lodge, at least for now. Next fall we go home to TN to live for a winter. And hopefully find work. Then next summer Dollywood jobs. The biggest drag for us is income. I still say I should win the lottery!!! But for us, as long as we have work and a better income than unemployment? We will do just fine!!! Sure there are some things I miss about living in a permanent spot such as knowing where to go for vehicle repairs or ? sales on things. But the advantages of and of not having a house to worry about or pay for is all to the good for us. I do miss Maine and the great friends we made up there. But then we can always go there to work and visit. Which is what we plan to do in 2013 for the summer!! Have already got a couple places picked out that we are going to apply to for that summer so we will have work/money and someplace to park and live!

So yeah. A touch of fear, a little bit of being in a rut, thoughts of the unknown it all plays a part.

If you think once you start getting SS that you can make it? That will be one big hurdle out of the way. The rest is just "stuff". And stuff is replaceable. TIME is not. You would live cheaper in a TT. How much of the money you make or have goes into living/upkeep/utilities/taxes? The costs of living in the house, work on the house and utilities would be gone. That for sure would free up some of your money.

Make yourself a list of expenses of living full time in the house then make yourself a list of your expenses of living full time in an RV. It wont be exact cause everyone lives differently. But you can guesstimate pretty good. Choice of location to park it for a while would be a determining factor on site rent. We live here in this park for $300 a month which includes FHU's and wifi internet and then we have to buy our propane. Quite a few parks don't include electric. But if your workamping? Then you don't need to worry about site rent.

Like I said, "stuff", houses are replaceable. Time isn't. Think of what you will miss if you stay planted in MI.

[BarbaraRose]

I know how you feel. I went thru all those questions myself two years ago. I was tired of the winters in MN, feeling like I was wasting 5 months every year doing nothing and having no fun. And not being very close to my family since my mom passed away, wondered if I could actually afford to make the move south. After going to several funerals of women my age and younger, I decided to do it now before I run out of time. There are no guarantees in this life. Once I made up my mind to do it (with some second thoughts popping up now and then), things just seemed to fall into place for me and now, here I am, living in Southern California and loving it! There have been some challenges but nothing I couldn't work thru.

Keep asking the questions and the answers will come. Look for signs that you are moving in the right direction. I like how you put that, instead of asking 'why?', start asking 'why not?' Too many people take the safe route and stay put for security reasons, and ultimately, their dreams pass them by. My parents never pursued their dreams either and I'm sure they've had their regrets about it.

Follow your heart

[dayspring39]

Those are tough questions you pose Sue... tough indeed... you are a wise hard working woman... you will face some of those same issues if you decide to sell... like Beth you could set out on the road for a year by then you would know if it was for you... or you could sit and ponder for a couple of years... hmmm interesting choices you have...
You are in my thoughts and prayers...
Kathleen

[cpatinjones]

You said, " know one thing for sure. This summer will make these decisions. This summer will be the one to see if I really want to do this. This summer will be the year I stop asking Why and starting asking Why Not. " My 2 cents: I think you are ready!

Your comments certainly give me food for thought. Thank you.

I am ready now, but will wait until the end of my retirement (2 years 9 months)! I don't want to work after retirement, unless I want too, not have too.

[Colliemom]

Ah, this is getting to be fun. I see I have struck a chord out there. Well, to answer a few questions from those who have answered so far.

Mitch: perhaps I should say this year and not this summer will make my decision, is cause this will be my second year hauling my little TT around. I was enjoying it last year and now that I have it, I can start eearlier as compared to mid summer last year. I want to pull it around more, take a couple of small extended trips to see how I like doing that and see if I like running around pulling at TT with me as opposed to an MH say. The more time I can spend out with it the more I will know if want to embrace the traveling RV lifestyle.

Redetotry: keep searching for some place to head south for winter next year and let me know if you find anything interesting. I'm thinkng the same thing and am kind of looking myself. Who knows, maybe we can wind up in the same place. Hope you can get to MI this summer so we can meet.

Echo and Nancy, thanks for sharing your thoughts. I am really enjoying reading what others are going through too and have been through. Some would look at this and think we are crazy. But then maybe a little craziness isn't all bad

Marth: I already made up my nind that when it get too old to keep up things around here, I would sell this place and get somethng smaller that I could keep up. I can either leave for the winter or hire somebody to plow me out in winter and there are places here where grass cutting, yard work etc. can just be minimal. A small house, less expense. I love this area I live in and I know in my heart that it will always be home for me no matter where I roam.

[Mollysmom]

I think we all wonder why sometimes - it's a tough place to be.
I sold "everything" and bought my 5th wheel & truck and hit the road - I mostly enjoyed my time on the road, but for the most part, I just kept thinking that I wanted to go home. The RV never felt like 'home' - the sites I saw were wonderful, but I didn't have anyone to share them with, and I missed that. For me, being in a "non-rolling" home is right - being close to my sisters is super important to me and I'm happy here. I don't like the winter, but it's not so bad since I don't own a home and don't have to shovel or worry about it too much.
I did spend allot of money to get the 5th wheel & truck and I gave away allot of my "stuff" but I'm slowing re-building ... I'd love to be able to buy a townhouse or condo, but I can't afford it right now. I have a decent little apartment and refuse to sit here wishing I had something else. For now it's home.
I have a quote hanging on my wall that says "The best things in life aren't things" - I try to remember that when I feel like I don't have the "stuff" or the money I had before.
I wouldn't trade my time on the road for anything - it help me to figure out what's important to me and I learned that I can do just darn near anything if I really want to.
Guess that's my story for what it's worth.

[Echo]

I have a quote hanging on my wall that says "The best things in life aren't things" - I try to remember that when I feel like I don't have the "stuff" or the money I had before.
I wouldn't trade my time on the road for anything - it help me to figure out what's important to me and I learned that I can do just darn near anything if I really want to.

Those two sentences have a lot of wisdom to them!!! The first one is for some very hard to get a grip on and remember. Some people put way to much importance and effort into ' material things'. Instead of physical or personal 'things'. Memories are good but a tea caddy or doily from 4x G'gramma or 3x G'Aunt Gertie can't keep your heart warm or alive and joyous. Family, friends and fur babies can!!!

The second one is one that everyone needs to know for themselves. Adventures and challenges whether big or small, physical or personal keep us young, moving, excited, open, interested, interesting and alive!!!

You wont know if you'll succeed if you don't first try.

[Readytogo]

Hi Sue, we talked about all us this a little bit after the chats a few times! I think we all have similair questions and feelings.Part of it is probably "cabin fever". I get it even with our relatively mild winters. But I have gound answrs just sort of fall into place. I decided i do want a "sticks and bricks" house after all, want a place to be and enjoy kids, grandkids, and friends that Im fortunate to have. But until I can sell this for enough to get maybe a new garden home or something amaller will keep it. Bur I also realize I have the freedom to come and go when I want otherwise, and its a good feeling. Its almost five years since I lost my husband and it has taken a long time to realize that life is not coming back! But like I said I thin k we all have a bit of the winter blahs, and the answers will come to you a little at a time! Have a good day, Wendy

[Mollysmom]

I had to come back to this topic and say that after the last week of snow and cold - if my family weren't here I'd move someplace warmer !
By this time of the year I'm sick of cold & coats & boots & gloves & scraping the car windows & shuffling along so I don't fall on the ice & the extra stuggles that go along with winter weather.
Ya' just want to go outside and yell ... Enough !!!!
But - the days are getting longer & the birds are occasionally singing their spring songs so I know that spring is close by.
Well, time to put on my boots, coat & gloves & go scrape the car windows and chug on in to work.