Mood Changers

[Bethers]

You can't read this and stay in a bad mood!

How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
Unique Up On It.


How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
Tame Way.


How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
They Take The Psychopath


How Do You Get Holy Water?
You Boil The Hell Out Of It


What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
Dam!

What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice Too Long?
Polaroids


What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
A Stick


What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
Nacho Cheese.


What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.


What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
Cuatro Cinco.


What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
Spoiled Milk.


What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?
Frostbite.


What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
A Nervous Wreck.


What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
Anyone Can Roast Beef.


Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
Right Where You Left Him.


Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
Because They Have Big Fingers.


Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
Because It Scares Their Dog.


What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
Sanka.


What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?!
The Location Of The Dirt Bag.


Why Did Pilgrims Pants Always Fall Down?
They Wore Their Belt Buckles On Their Hats.


What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack Dang!
A Bad Skydiver Goes, Dang, Whack!


How Are a Texas And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?
Somebody's Gonna Lose a Trailer.


Support Bacteria. They're The Only Culture Some People Have!!

[avalen]

I heard some of those from my kids last year and I laughed then too