A NEW BEGINNING

[Nasoosie]

GOOD MORNING TO ALL

An appology for my being absent----when I am depressed, I can''t even bring myself to type----but today is a new beginning!

The Today Show is showing the horrible devastation of that Nor'easter that is still affecting us up here in the mountains. Yesterday we had just dangerous winds and clouds, and today we are still getting dangerous winds and heavy snow is coming down. If this keeps on all day today, we might have to use one of our snow days after all. I need to call my brother when I am sure he's up to see how he made out in the Philly suburbs area----they have tons of huge, tall trees in their yard which is a bad thing, but they are on a hill, which is a good thing in the heavy rains that have caused floods all over. Once again, I am feeling lucky that I am where I am, and just suffering the loss of some trees somewhere away from the house. I am so hoping my leanto will still be ok and not suffer the fate of my outhouse down there.

I had a good telephone talk with my son and Melissa last night, and talked more with my daughter during the day. I guess they now realize that I have been really nuts trying to make decisions and plans for the rest of my life. It was unfair of me to not let them know sooner, I guess. Weldon and Melissa are going to look at a fantastic house in Groveland today, a foreclosure, with a huge drive-through barn with horse stalls, brand new metal roofs on all buildingS, 3 bedroms and two bathrooms, a two car garage, inground pool, two fenced-in horse pens, 10 acres with a long boardwalk that crosses wetlands (away from the house) that ends with a dock and has a lockable boathouse at the end on a beautiful lake that hooks up with a massive chain of lakes in all of central FL! They said they have plans for me to live there in the winters (or year 'round, if it should come to that) and be their live-in baby sitter when they have kids! You can't imagine what a boost that gave me----REAL LIVE GRANDBABIES a possibility! And they might even need me! I had given up that I would live long enough to experience such a treat! And they said I can park my trailer down there and stay for free for as long as I want, as I travel around and explore the campgrounds of the FL area----of course, that's when they actually end up with a piece of property! I am so excited for them and for me, this morning. The plan is to sell the FL house they are in now, after they spruce it up a bit to look the best it can, and go for somewhere that a trailer, both boat and travel, will be allowed on the property. The Homeowners' Association where they are now prevents them from feeling as if they actually own the place.

Despite the horrid winds and snow coming down, and the 2,000 dollars I owe the IRS, I am feeling ever so much better this morning than I have in a long while. Just knowing what the plan possibilities are, and that perhaps I am not just a fossil left to die alone, gives what's left of my life some purpose! A person needs some purpose to be happy, at least I do. Divorce and separation (and I am sure widowhood) cause people to become more and more isolated as old friends who are still twosomes never know where their loyalties lie, feel awkward, and thus tend to ignore the two who have moved apart. Also, I always feel like a fifth wheel if I go visit them. If I weren't still working in my same job, I could move on and meet new friends and create new friendships and bonds---but I have been totally alone and isolated in the long, dark, cold winters up here for far too long. Finding this group and my other group of women RVers has been my only touch with new friends, and it has saved me, literally. I can't ever thank you all enough for being there in byteland for me to whine to! But meeting up once a year in person makes for some long waits and deep depression in between.

BUT----let this be the first day in my new life, and may I choose the road less-traveled that will allow me to be a happy camper. I am being encouraged to retire by my entire family. Everything looks brighter to me this morning! Stop by and have some coffee, and let us know if you are one of those with no power in the northeast----and are operating on your backup generators! I'm going to build me a new woodfire----I kept the house at 80 degrees yesterday and was warm for the first time all winter! Happy Sunday to us all.

[Cedar518]

Good morning Soos,... and all...

Wow Soos, I'm so glad to read all of this,.... three cheers for Weldon and Melissa and Mandy for coming through for you. I'm so happy for you. I know you have been down from our chats,... and this does sound wonderful for you to have a plan in place to go live with Weldon and Melissa and use that as your home base.

Just overcast skies here,... no wind, no snow and no rain,.... deck is wet from some rain before daylight. Not sure how the rest of the day will play out for us weather-wise.

Off now to head north to Plattsburgh, going out for breakfast and then to the Home Show.

Have a great day everyone,.... I know you will, Soos!

[Nasoosie]

and this does sound wonderful for you to have a plan in place to go live with Weldon and Melissa and use that as your home base.

Actually, their place will be just my WINTER home base as I explore campgrounds and parks-----this place will forever be my most favorite spot in the world in the summers! (And, if I can hang around long enough, I will want to ski a bit, too, before I hit the warmth and the pools in FL!)

[carold]

Soos, looks like there is a large bright window at the end of your tunnel Isolation and a depressing job seem like they might be going to lay by the wayside and new opportunities await. How wonderful that your kids are stepping up to the plate and giving back what you gave them. You must be very proud. Glad ours and the other forums gave you an out. Looking forward to following you on your new road. May you have the sun in your face and the wind at your back (or however that goes ). Hope everyone has a good day. Off to do some canoeing on the Myakka River. carold

[Ladyhawk]

Soos, I strongly believe the statement, "It's always darkest before the dawn." Maybe it just proves how much inner strength we have, pulling ourselves back into the game. Come out to Colorado. We have days when we're wearing shorts in the city, but drive 45 minutes and you're skiing in the foothills.

Heading for Scottsdale in a few hours. STRONG winds in the northern part of New Mexico making some pretty tough driving. There's also a whole lotta ugly in the northern part of New Mexico. Nothing to inspire me while I was driving. By the time it became beautiful, I was battling wind and road work and didn't see much of it.

Very nice campground here. Great place for Bobby to run around. He made a friend and I could see him at the playground from the rv. He's an amazing navigator, helping me find my way by reading the map and signs.

Coffee and a bagel this morning. Stop by and check out the new coffee maker my mom gave me. It's one of those single serve things that makes coffee, tea, and hot chocolate. I have plenty for everyone!

[retiredhappy]

Soos, so glad you're feeling better. I think we all get a bit of the mean uglies in the winter. Sounds like your kids have a plan. Sometimes I don't think our kids realize how much we need to feel needed when they get wrapped up in their own lives. This forum has often kept me from feeling lonely, too. As for retiring, I advise you to do it as soon as you can. Life is too short not to enjoy it as much as possible. I retired early even tho it meant not as much money but I've never regretted it.

[mitch5252]

Soos, I was sorry to hear you were having such a difficult time, but it sure sounds like things are improving! What a great plan you outlined to us. It's wonderful you woke up your happy self this morning and realized that a new phase in your life is just beginning. Wow - how exciting!! Just think of all your friends here you will be able to visit. Heck, I live so far out in the country, you can pitch a tent anywhere and run around nekkid if you want to!!

Welcome back!

PS: I did your "hair" (on Karen's birthday post) before I read your post here. I'd be happy to get rid of it, if you'd like. Or keep it up if it gave you a smile!

..

[avalen]

Good morning ladies,
Soos, I certainly share the feeling, and am so glad today is a new beginning for you.
Wish my plans were as laid out as yours, but in time I too will see the light.
I heard birds singing this morning, so I know spring is right around the corner.
Going to Home Depot today, gotta pick up a fence post and a pair of garden
gloves as I lost my pair from last year. Will be putting in a gate on the back
fence so I can take the doggies out in the field. A friend has a gate for me, just
need to get one post and a little hardware. So thats my plan and I'm stickin to it!
Coffee's good and the last bagel with cream cheese makes my breakfast.
Have a great day and be safe.

[AlmostThere]

Morning!

Soos! Wow, I certainly wish your son/family good luck in purchasing the property! That's such good news.
I was hoping for the same thing with my son as he was going to retire from the Air Force this summer and buy some property. Told me he'd build me a mother in law apt that I could live in when not RVing. I was estatic (? geez I wish I had my spell checker back), until he told me just after Christmas that he's re-upped for another 4 yrs! I totally understand that he has to think of his family's future etc. and I know both my kids would take me in in a heartbeat should it ever come to that. Let us know asap when they hear anything definate. Check in often concerning that horrid storm you are in!

Amy/Bobby, thanks for checking in. Sorry the weather/roads are crummy, but sounds like Bobby is a great traveling companion!

After breakfast I'm going to take my first "happy pill". So if I start posting like a drunkin' sailor, you'll know why!

Have a good one, ladies!

[BarbaraRose]

Soos, I can relate to some of what you've been feeling. So many times I get feeling very "stuck" in my life. Like I am just reliving the same old boring day over and over with nothing to look forward to. It is very depressing. However, I usually get to a point (like you have) where I decide I need to make some radical changes and get my life going in a new direction with purpose and something great to look forward to. Getting an RV was one of those decisions, but since that didn't work out (for now), planning to move to CA is my new plan and has really got me in a whole new frame of mind now. I think cabin fever can also make a person feel down and very isolated. I am so glad to hear you have a new plan for the future as well now, and can hopefully start looking forward to a bright and adventurous future with old and new friends in your life. Count on us to keep you motivated! We all need that proverbial "carrot" in front of us to run after, and without that we are just runnng in circles going nowhere fast.

AlmostThere, the "happy pills" take about 2 weeks to start working and you will just notice one day that you are feeling better about everything. So you won't be dancing on tables this afternoon (unless there is something we don't know about you yet!)

The sun is out today! So nice after a whole week of rain! I can't believe all the snow you guys in the NE have had to deal with this winter!! We don't even get that much snow here! Altho the flooding on local rivers has already begun, but that is normal this time of year.

[jemek]

Soos..that sounds awesome. I will hope that all goes well with selling the house and then buying the new piece.
I so understand their feeling on the HOA...we live in one...and to be honest I would NEVER do it again. The politics/infighting alone drive me nuts.

We are all doing well...just a relaxing weekend..spent time cleaning the house, worked on the yard a little, but it still cold out there. It seems the winter like weather finally showed up and is here for a bit.

Working on getting the short summer camping trips figured out. We will have 3-4 of those.

[Excel]

Soos...glad you shared what's been going on in your life. As I read the replies I thought how kind & supporting these gals are....kinda warms your heart. But back to your post...again, you put into words what a lot of us face....every family isn't so close knit that there's a place for us with them at some point in the future, so you are so blessed that your kids are there for you. Seems to me it would be great if the dream comes alive & the property you describe becomes a reality for all of you. But, what's more important (I think), is that you shared your feelings with your kids & they came back & shared theirs with you....It's beautiful...so no matter what happens tomorrow or the next day or the next....you know they are going to be there for you....Enjoy your wealth...can't put a price tag on the kind of love around you...but seems to me you're worth it.....so kick back, smile & enjoy....

[Nasoosie]

Your supportive posts have me crying again----not in pain, but with joy! I know I am so lucky to have you all out there in my life----it has taken me through this most difficult winter of my life thus far. And I know there is comfort in having numbers of us who are sort of in the same boat----peers, that is, who have been through very similar experiences in life. Some have had much more serious problems than what I have faced, and I have felt guilty complaining in the face of those.

I do fully realize how lucky I am to have kids who can sympathize and empathize with me and forgive me for the craziness I have been feeling. No matter what happens with property, homes, money, whatever, from here on, at least I know I am not really a nag put out to pasture while the rest of the world goes on without me. And I know that I will be an asset in the future rather than an anchor around their necks. I have reached a turning point and there is no need to look back now---just forward with hope. Although I still haven't made the end decision to retire in June, chances are I will, and will be happy with that decision.....and there will be no looking back and no regrets when I give that final farewell to a life I chose about 50+ years ago. I will look forward to a new chapter, new experiences, new friends, new outlooks.

After watching little Hope (Lily's baby) today, I have to take those tottering steps she is now taking to become independent! She is my mentor. I wish I could pick her up and hug that furry little body!

As I told my kids in my appology letter for my insane behavior when I learned of their upcoming vacation together to Costa Rica, I survived giving away my first-born child, survived a crib death of my third child, survived a husband dallying with his barmaid, and now I am finding myself turning into a spastic, crazy jellyfish when facing a retirement decision? What's that all about, anyway? Actually, I think I know that this is the year when I first realized I might not live forever. I'm a late bloomer!

I am so thankful to have you all out there, and, believe me, I will try to meet each and every one of you face-to-face when I get free!

[Echo]

HELLO SISTAHS!!!

Soos, I for one will look forward to that meeting!!! It'll be a good one for sure!!! Winters, miserable jobs, isolation and a general feeling of uselessness can bring the best of them down. I know I have stretched my boot straps close to breaking at times getting up out of the depression hole. And I will need to get the sewing machine out as my BIG GIRL panties need new elastic too. Hmmm? Might put a few new ribbons and bows on them suckers while I'm at it! Make 'em more festive!!! Hang in there my friend you WILL get to where you want and need to be. I have lots of faith in you.

WOW! Nasty, nasty winds here last night!!! Kelly and I wanted to go hide to get out of them but didn't dare to. We stood for an hour or more holding onto the framework for the canopy to make sure it didn't pull up the stakes and take to the air. We were terrified that it would take flight and crash into a neighbors RV! But our nice ? 2wk ? old canopy is history now! The winds were so bad that it twisted and bent the frame all out of shape. And where the velcro was sewn to attach it to the frame? Well the velcro held fast to the frame but ripped clean out of the canopy itself. One of the rips is a good 12" long. We gave up at about 1am, picked up, stacked up, covered the picnic table, dropped the tarps, pulled the canopy top off and said *&^%(* it. This morning we set the small 9x13 screen house back up and have set up our "combo living room/kitchen again in the much smaller space. We both had tears in our eyes at the loss of the big canopy room with all it's usable space. We now have the smaller one staked down, tied out and as secure as we can get it. This smaller space is a pain in the azz but this one at least withstood the tornado force winds a whole lot better than the other one handled the winds last night. I am so grateful that we hadn't given this smaller one away. There were a couple of neighbors who were interested in it when we set the big one up. Will have to do a little research on what kind or what else me might be able to buy to use for better protection and stability on something at least a little bigger than this. ~sigh~

Nothing else much at all exciting here going on other than the wind..... OMG!! I am so sick and tired of the constant wind. Nice gentle breezes are wonderful but this freaking wind is driving me nuts. I remember when I was way younger watching movies about the depression and the "Dust Bowl" and how people went insane because of the wind and dust covering everything. I think I have a much greater understanding of what they went thru and felt now. Everyday is a constant struggle trying to keep things wiped off and clean. Wash the dishes and before we can use them? We have to make sure we wipe them off first because of the dust. It did not help at all in the winds last night that there are a huge number of empty spots here in the campground now. Our neighbors that were right along the side of us with the big 5'er left yesterday. With the 5'er sitting there it blocked a lot of the wind out of the north. There is no one behind our site and the neighbors on out other side left today. So now our 'site' is wide open. Ought to be interesting to say the least!!

It's been a bit since I've been on, but I have stopped in to read some of the postings. There have been newbies who have joined and birthdays I've missed. Tho I did post to Karen's wall a Happy Birthday wish! Welcome to the newbies, sorry I missed your intro's. But will look forward to reading your adventures and or dreams!

Coffee is gone! I drank every bit of it, right to the last drop. The coffee pot is out by the power plug-ins sitting on a upside down cooler. It needed a good cleaning out so I ran vinegar thru it. Got to out and put the second quart bottle in and run that one too. Should be good to go then!!!

Hoping that ya'll in the northeast are doing ok! Have heart, Spring is on the way!!! Remember everyone to please be safe in all that you do!

Love to all

[BarbaraRose]

Gosh, Echo, that sounds so terrifying to be in that kind of wind! Lucky you two didn't get hurt trying to hold the porch up! I assume the tents held up OK? That is too bad that you lost the new porch but lucky you kept the little one, so you at least have that to use for now. Can you move to another camp site or campground that is more protected? I hate wind like that, too. Makes me so nervous and anxious!