I am really mad.

[SoCalGalcas]

My daughter has decided she is going to move to New Hampshire with her boy friend! I have to decide what I want to do. All these decisions are driving me nuts. I have options….Remember, I have no car. She promised to drive me anywhere . My mind is spinning…
More info as the days pass…..Lyn

[BarbaraRose]

I am sure that was a shock to hear. I assume that means she will be selling the condo? Go thru all your options and do what is best for YOU! Keep us informed of your decision or if you just want to vent or get some advice. We are all here for you! (((hugs)))!

[Bethers]

Oh Lyn, that's a blow for sure. Can you keep the condo? Take deep breaths and give this a bit of time to settle and hopefully your future will show itself to you. Hugs!

[cnq50b]

Oh Lyn, I am so sorry!
I can't even imagine how you must feel at the moment. I hope you have some time to think through all your options & I also hope one of them is staying in SoCal. Feel free to weigh your options and/or even just vent here among your friends.

Maybe we need a SoCal GTG - even if its just lunch - for those close-by.

in the meantime - take a deep breath & trust that all will be well.

[BarbaraRose]

Maybe we need a SoCal GTG - even if its just lunch - for those close-by.

I am all in for that!

[JudyJB]

I am really sorry to hear that. How much time do you have to figure out what you want to do? I know you are used to San Diego, but maybe there are other places you might like to live outside of California or in other places within California.

[snowball]

I don't blame you!!! they say that it help's to make a list with each of your options put down the positive and negative parts of that options... I wish I was in Q I would try to get to that GTG
it's hard to know what to do... where are your other children?
sheila

[Liz]

I am sorry for you Lyn. Consider moving to Florida: https://www.acvillage.net/
That is one reason I did not move near either of my daughters. Young people tend to move. This retirement Village offers a variety of living options for a variety of needs and incomes. Transportation is provided in the Village with your membership. Weekly trips to Walmart and Publix and other special trips are made as well. There is an abundance of activities to fit many interests. We have a county public library, fitness center ( no fee for members), indoor and outdoor pool, grocer, pharmacy, hair salon, shops, clinic, physical therapy, etc. Check it out.

[Pooker]

Oh, Lyn, I understand exactly how you feel. Betrayed! I'm really in for a GTG, too, a sounding board group. There probably are more options than you can think of. There are senior transport vans available that may be covered under insurance to go to medical app'ts and even grocery shopping. Does your HOA offer that? We are blessed here in California with a lot of unassisted living facilities and various organizations can help find those options. And their services are free. We never want to think about being a burden on our kids and the decisions are never easy. If I remember correctly, your gorgeous condo isn't within walking distance of everything you would need, so your brain must be spinning. Can you take enough time to explore all possibilities? Don't hesitate to PM us if you need an ear or just another brain to brainstorm. I wish we had places like Liz's, which sounds so heavenly, but those places that come close to that are very, very expensive here.

Sending hugs ((Lyn)). Writing down pros and cons is always a good idea.

Evie

[BirdbyBird]

Not helpful but my first thought was...has her daughter ever lived in New Hampshire. I like to visit in the summer but those winters will take some getting used to.

Put your thinking cap on and do your research.....It is hard to give up an area that you have grown up in and know so well (I was paying attention when you gave me those tours) You know more about what the rest of the world looks and feels like from your travels. More than most folks. Looks like your life is still going to offer you up some more adventures. Any grands want to share with an adventurous Grandma?

Do you get to keep the dog in the separation?

[BarbaraRose]

I know you have other kids and grandkids in the SD area. Hopefully, they will chime in with ideas and options to help you.

I know your condo is owned by your daughter. Sounds like she is planning to sell it.
Yes, look into assisted living places if you can afford to. Not sure what your financial situation is like, but where I live, you can buy a park model for less than 100K and own the land which means you don't have lot rent to pay each month, just $350 per month for HOA which is very affordable. (if I can afford to live here, anyone can!) Lots of things to do here and 6 swimming pools to choose from! Just another option to consider and you wouldn't be too far from San Diego and your other kids, etc.

[chalet05]

Lyn, I don't have any suggestions to add, but we are certainly here for you! Hugs!

[Irmi]

Lyn, I can't add anything to what has already been said, but am curious as to what options your daughter gave you. I've heard the area that Liz and Nancy are in is very nice and is would be great to have you so close by. Weigh your options and please stay in touch. (((Hugs)))

[SoCalGalcas]

Thanks for all the comments on my situation. M daughter does not plan on selling the condo at this time. She has never lived where it snows.
She offered to take me to NH, but I do not want to be anywhere near her controlling BF.
I have been researching both senior living and assisted living. My short term plan is to stay here and keep researching.
I am so sorry I sold my car.
I will keep venting here. Appreciate any suggestions. Lyn

[Colliemom]

Oh gosh Lyn, that’s something we shouldn’t have to worry about in old age. But like Beth said, it unfortunately is.

Hope you and your daughter come to some sort of plan. She may get out there and after awhile, decide she doesn’t like it, or parts ways with her boyfriend. So I’m hoping for you, that she keeps the condo for awhile and you have time to make alternative plans just in case.

I too kind of think about where I would go if I can’t stay in my home anymore. I love this area and I love Michigan, so I know I will never leave the State. Wish we had something like where Birdie and Liz are. Best of luck in the decision process.