Memories of Christmas Moms and Christmases Past

[Cudedog]

Quite a few thoughts have been shared on this topic already, thought that it might be time for it to have it's own thread.

What are your best/funniest/most sad memories of Christmas (or, if you don't celebrate Christmas, what are you memories of the holiday that you do celebrate)? What special/funny thing did your Mom (or Dad!) do for Christmas? What special/funny unexpected event happened at Christmas?

What special Christmas song, or music, or scene, sends you back to that time?

Do you find the Holiday season difficult as you have gotten older?

Or - add your own question or comment here: ________________

Many of the things that come to mind, for me, is the music. As I said in a previous post, the secular Christmas music (for me) brings back the most intense memories. Probably because, at a very young age, we kids had our own record player, and records. I remember playing the Gene Autry (remember him?) version of "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" ad nauseam (my Mom would finally tell us to quit playing it for a while). This back when I still believed that there really was a Santa Claus.

If this song comes on while I am in the mall (doesn't matter the artist) I am outta there.

Like Queen said in an earlier post, I can't bear to listen to "I'll Be Home For Christmas", although it was a huge favorite of mine when my Mom was still living, and when I still looked forward to going home for the holiday.

I especially liked the Anne Murray version (she sings a nice prolog):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmDR1uH3R70

After reading Sue's comments about Christmas music, and Queen's comments about this particular song, I tried to figure out why it effects me so. I think it is because that I can never again (nor can most of us) "be home for Christmas", at least to the home I grew up in, with Mom, a big smile on her face, waiting there to welcome me. This is probably true for most of us here.

I guess, for maybe the first time, I realized that this song is not about being home for Christmas at all - but it is about not being able to be home for Christmas ever again. As the song says: "I'll be home for Christmas - if only in my dreams".

Anyway, easy to be maudlin for the season, but I'm not really looking for that.

Let's tell some funny stories here - I'm sure all of you know some - let's put a match to the fireplace, fire up the old Yule log, sit down and put our feet up and down a cup of Christmas Cheer.

Anne

[OregonLuvr]

I enjoy all the Christmas songs for a while. And yes, they bring back many memories of times gone by. But I have the happiest of memories growing up and then raising a family. Times have changed for me as any family is quite a ways away. Kids grow up find their own lives. But I still like the holidays. I have a new "normal" and being a nurse I have usually always worked the holidays and let the younger ones with kids have it off. It is just another day for me but I do decorate (minimally) and listen to some holiday tunes at times. I just am never sad this time of year. I am just happy to still be around LOL

[Bethers]

I love Christmas music. I love the sappy Hallmark movies and cry at almost all of them, even knowing from the beginning how they'll end.

One of my favorite Christmas memories as a child was going for a car ride to an area that always was decorated to the nines. I wouldn't be surprised but it still is. Christmas evening we went to friends of my parents, every year. By the time I was 16, I worked nearly every Christmas, so my family got together Christmas Eve. I've never felt sad or lonely on Christmas. I've celebrated two of them in Baja since RVing. I've volunteered at town/church dinners. Sometimes I've just hibernated and reflected. And all of them I've been thankful for making the most of what I've had. Even though I lost my Dad at 13, I think many of the things he taught me are a lot of why I feel happy in life. For many years of my childhood my dad had a Christmas party for all the neighborhood children. Every single one got a present. And all had a great time. Santa came and I often was Santa's helper passing out the presents. (An aside about my dad... My mom and dad had a savings account for new furniture. When he died my mom had never gotten any new. Every time the account had enough money... NO credit would happen... Someone in the neighborhood or a relative or friend would have a crisis and that money went to help.) He taught me the true value of giving.

[JudyJB]

Actually, Christmas was my dad's thing, not my mother's. My dad came from a very poor family where he was the oldest. His mother died when he was 18 and his father and closest brother died four years later, leaving my dad with a 9-year-old brother and sisters, ages 18, 14, and 13. (The oldest sister took the two younger in, and my parents who were just married and expecting a baby took in the 9-year-old, who is the uncle I sometimes post about.) They barely had a place to live, let alone celebrate Christmas when my dad was young.

So, when I was young, my dad was making a lot of money in the post-war building boom, so he went nuts for Christmas. He always bought a huge tree and filled the floor under it with presents. I was very spoiled. My dad liked to cook, and he always made a huge beef roast and would have a bar set up with a punch bowl filled with shrimp and drinks for anyone who stopped by.

My mother baked, but she really did not like to cook, BUT she came from a large family. I had 9 sets of aunts and uncles living within 3 miles of us, so we would all go for Christmas Eve to one aunt's tiny house and packed it. I was grandchild #8, but there were maybe 16 or 17 after me, all the way down to babies. (This was definitely the baby boom.) We would buy small gifts for all the kids, even the teenagers, and Santa would pass them out at my aunt's house. Those parties with all my cousins were my best memories of Christmas.

I am really sorry that my kids missed out on having a lot of close cousins. I had 3 cousins across the street, 2 next door, 2 down the road a block, 1 half a block farther, and three older ones about half a mile away!

On Christmas Day, we would meet with my dad's family, which was a lot smaller, and at that time had only boys for cousins, so it was not as much fun. Not as noisy or raucous, either!

[Irmi]

I love Christmas music. Since I am the organist in church, I also love playing the carols. I was raised in the church as far back as I can remember, and loved the Christmas Eve service. Dad put the tree up that day and I would sit on the couch after dark for hours watching the lights. My parents did everything they could to make Christmas special, as poor as they were. My parents and siblings are the only family we have in this country, so it was always a big deal getting a package from Germany for Christmas from our grandparents, sending German chocolate, and other gifts. Since Steve & I don't have children, we enjoy spending the day with friends on the campground or from church.

[SoCalGalcas]

I love, love, love ALL. Christmas music. The only sad song for me is I’ll Be Home For Christmas. Lyn

[JudyJB]

By the way, one of my most vivid memories of my childhood was choir at the elementary school. Mostly, i remember singing or trying to sing, O Holy Night! This was not a selective choir, so my whole class participated. We must have been truly horrible at hitting those high notes! That was my sole choir experience as a child.

[cnq50b]

The only song that gets to me is 'Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas'... Always has, always will.

As a kid, I loved helping Daddy putting together toys for the younger kids. In a family with 8 kids, private time with Daddy was cherished more than any gift. He worked 3 jobs at Christmas time so they could get each of us 1 gift. For fun, we practiced Christmas 'sneak-ups' for weeks before Christmas, trying to sneak down from upstairs to see if we could catch Santa. I'm sure Mom loved it because a key to being successful was being very, very quiet which kept the little kids occupied for quite a while.

As we all married & had families of our own, the tradition was for everyong to go to Mom & Daddy's house Christmas eve. Each adult sibling/family drew the name of the younger kids & bought them a gift. Adults & teens could participate in a white elephant exchanges if they wanted to. Lots of fun, food, chaos, babies & kids all over the place. The last year we gatherd at Mom's there were over 60 of us. We always left early enough to get little ones to bed so Santa could come.

Christmas Day was spent leisurely enjoying special breakfast foods while the kids opened & played with their toys. Many a time, we found ourselves back at Mom's just to visit for a while & show her what Santa brought.

It's different now... not bad, just different... I still get to enjoy Olivia & my son & DIL Christmas morning/day which, in reality, is much easier than the chaos of earlier years. Sometimes we're able to organize a video call with my son's family in KS, daughter's family in TX & Gaby & Irwin in France. We all wish we could be together but it is what it is.

I think we each have to find out what works for us now. Cherish our memories but relish the peacefulness that we can experience now.

[BarbaraRose]

I am loving this thread! Thank you Anne for starting this!

My parents also did not have a lot of money. My mom was like Mrs. Santa Claus! Christmas was her BIG thing! She made sure we had everything we wanted for Christmas which was fun for my brothers and I. She always made my brother Paul and I, a stocking. (David was already grown and on his own by the time I was around). She wrapped each little item in tissue paper and stuffed everything in the stockings and we were so excited to get up early on Christmas morning to open them and then play with all our new stuff! She continued to give us a stocking even as adults but she had to get bigger stockings to fit everything in. Eventually she started pinning a "piggy back" stocking to the big one, with more stuff in it! I cherished those stockings! That is the one thing I really miss each Christmas now. Christmas was just never the same after she passed. My brother David and his wife took over having Christmas at their house and it felt more like just going thru the motions after that. We stopped doing gifts eventually and just did a white elephant gift with the dice game. I missed being able to buy special gifts for people and watching them open them to see their reaction. Recent years I felt more like an outsider with my brothers and their wives and kids doing their own Christmas thing.

Unfortunately, my dad was an alcoholic and usually got very drunk on Christmas Eve, which generally spoiled the mood very quickly and made things very uncomfortable. Some years I was able to beg him not to drink and he wouldn't, and those times were so much more relaxed and fun. Other times were a nightmare. I prefer to remember the good ones and the way my mom made it so special for us in spite of my dad.

My parents had a bitter divorced when I was 12 but after so many years later my dad invited my mom to come over for Christmas Eve. After we got done there, my mom and I would head to her sister's or brother's house and do another Christmas party there. They had very small houses and there were lots of cousins, aunts, uncles, etc who all smoked. It was so smoky you couldn't see across the room but we had a great time.

The women on my mom's side of the family would all get together just before or after Christmas for "Secret Pal". We drew names the year before and would send anonymous cards throughout the year and then give a gift at the Secret Pal get-together, then draw names for the next year. It was always a lot of fun (and food!) with several generations of women there from ages 16 to 90. The number of women has dwindled down considerably over the years with the older ones passing on and the younger ones not wanting to participate. I think there are only 7 or 8 now in the group.

When I was little, my grandma, aunt, uncle and 2 cousins (on my dad's side) would come for Christmas Eve. Then Santa would knock on the door and say "ho, ho, ho". By the time I ran to the door, he was gone. A few minutes later, my uncle would come in and I would ask him if he saw Santa! I never quite caught on.

Now I like to just go to church on Christmas Eve (my dad and I would go the midnight service together if he wasn't drinking). I will probably go to the beach this year or go kayaking on Christmas Day. I do miss the earlier family get-togethers even if they weren't perfect.

Sorry this is so long, but this has brought up a lot of memories for me that I haven't thought about for awhile.

[Pooker]

I'm guessing we'd all wish for the "good old days" to come back if we could. I have been listening to the season's music since Thanksgiving and never tire of them. We only have a month to enjoy this music, so I intend to get my month's worth! Yes, I cry through some of them, but that's okay, because I'll sing along with All I Want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth when the tears stop.

Santa always arrived on Christmas Eve at our house. I was an only child until age 16 when my baby sister was adopted, so at some point it was always arranged that I wasn't home for a spell. Someone would take me out for a ride to see all the lights, or there was a last minute trip to a store for some forgotten item. Santa always managed to arrive while I was gone! Like Barbie, I never caught on either! Early Christmas morning we piled in the car for the two hour trip to my aunt's house near Boston. No turnpikes or interstates in those days. We drove through all the towns and cities along the way. Everyone on my mother's side of the family attended and EVERYONE brought presents for everyone else. It was a magical, wonderful, chaotic time. My two aunts both wanted the turkey tail and would hide it from each other! An uncle always played some prank on his stepson, and another uncle kept everyone in stitches with his wit. I always felt so loved. At some point after the huge meal in the cellar where my uncle set up one very long plywood table, my older, college age cousin would sit at the piano in the living room playing song after song while I sat on the sofa entranced. He never, ever got tired of having this much younger cousin following him around begging him to play for her.

When I had a family of my own, I vowed they would get a proper Christmas morning experience and not have the rushed, Christmas Eve opening Santa presents that I had. Since we had to get up so early Christmas morning, as soon as the last present was opened I was whisked off to bed and never got to play with my new toys! So, we had our Christmas morning routine with our boys, but it was still rushed! Because I was a choir director it meant we went to church Christmas Eve and Christmas morning and if Christmas was near a weekend, there was a Sunday service thrown in there, too. After church, we'd rush to my mother's house, then my in-laws (or vice versa) and have dinner. My kids also complained about not being able to play with their newly opened toys! Since we had a lot of family living nearby, we never knew who or how many would stop by our house on any given Sunday and always during the holidays. I often wished for peace and quiet without so many family folks under foot all the time. Be careful what you wish for. Now I have no extended family nearby and all of those aunts, uncles and cousins are gone.

So enjoy those holiday songs, remember whatever good memories you have, and to all of you - those I've met in person and those I know only electronically - have a very happy holiday and a terrific 2019!

Pooker

[Cudedog]

Oh my!!

Karen, Beth, Judy, Irmi, Lyn, Catherine, Barbie, Pooker!!

I am truly loving reading your stories! They have all cheered me up considerably, and put a new bounce in my step (much needed for the coming holidays!!). So much so that I think that, later today, I will actually put on some Christmas music for the first time this season, as I continue to do my annual house cleaning.

I clean my house once a year, whether it needs it or not. . .

I sincerely hope that other Forum members will post on this thread. And if you have already posted, but remember something new, please post again!!

These stories of Christmases past have truly lightened my spirits.

I send out my love to all of you.

Anne

[Shirlv]

Afternoon All, I would have been considered a “free range child” by today’s standards. I was about 8 or 9 taking my mother’s money and her list to the post office for money orders to pay the bills. We lived on the outskirts of a small town so I walked a ways to get a transit bus. Around the same age I took my two dollars, got on the bus to downtown Baltimore to do my Christmas shopping. I loved the bus because Baltimore was a melting pot of nationalities, Polish, Italian, German, etc. All speaking their native tongue and me trying to understand one word. The city was beautifully decorated, Christmas music playin and upscale stores had things I couldn’t afford but loved to see. I guess that is why Silver Bells is my favorite song. I had a hot dog and an orange drink at Neddicks sp?. Did all my shopping at Kresgies sp? five and dime. Took me hours to spend that money I earned at a local day care. Went home happy smiling all the way. I chopped our Christmas tree down with a hatchet, took a long time. Was an old scrubby pine but smelled so good. After dragging the tree home I had to go back and cut extra branches. Mom would drill holes in the tree trunk and insert the extra branches, sorta built a tree. We had beautiful trees. Sorry if you are as old as dirt you do rattle on.

[BarbaraRose]

Shirl, my parents did the same thing with their first tree! It was so sparse that they went back and got more branches, drilled holes in the trunk and filled in the bare spots. Too funny that your family did the same thing!

Your story also reminded me of when my mom and dad would take us kids in the car to downtown Minneapolis to see the storefronts all decorated. Each store window was set up with animated (moving) animals and people in different winter and Christmas scenes. It was so fun to walk up and down the streets looking at all the scenes. Sometimes it was so cold out that we didn't get out of the car but just looked at them thru the windows. I was really little when we did that. Back then we also would go to my grandma's house (dad's mom) for Christmas which was fun too. She really knew how to cook! I spent a lot of time at her house when I was really young because of my home life being so messed up. I loved it there!

[Irmi]

Shirl & Barbie, my Dad used to transform the tree he cut and do the same thing, cut off branches and drill holes, to make the tree look uniform. He was so proud of his artistic talent. Mom always had her stereo going with Christmas music, including the Handel's Messiah, which she loved. I must have gotten my love of music from her. I have lots of their records and phonograph, which they left to me. Oh, and butter cookies, chocolate chip cookies, apple sauce cake and I know I'm forgetting so much more.

[Acadianmom]

I can remember cutting down a tree at my grandfather's farm for Christmas but don't remember how we would get them home. There was my mom and dad and 4 kids so the car was full of people. There was no way my dad was going to buy a tree. I loved the Sears' Christmas catalog. We would make lists of all the toy's we wanted and mine would be about 4 pages long. lol Sometimes we would all get what we called an Indian blanket. I'm sure they were cheap blankets but we were allowed to do anything we wanted with them. We could drag them around all we wanted, make tents or hammocks.

One of my favorite songs is Jingle Bell Rock. I have a lot of Christmas CD's but not real sure where my player is. I haven't been hearing much Christmas music, probably because I seldom turn a radio on. Duh!

You all are going me make me make Butter cookies yet!

Martha