Scared ...

[BirdbyBird]

Well said 'soosie, well said. Something that makes us think hard and examine our feelings is not a bad thing.....

[AlmostThere]

I was talking to my SIL last night and mentioned how I felt this house owned me and not me owning the house. He knows I want to go RVing, but is jaded as he saw his parents loose allot of $$ trying to sell their MH after his Dad got too ill to travel. Of course he's against me selling my home in this market climate, but I was a bit surprised when he mentioned renting the house out. It's a thought, but still, for me, I want to only RV for a couple wks at a time and then have a homebase to return to. So my wheels are still turning, but perhaps in a more positive direction.
Thanks for all the kind, encouraging thoughts.

[Getupngo]

AlmostThere, your story really touches me. Your thoughts are my thoughts. I want to have a home base. But I'm having trouble financially handling a house AND an RV. I could go back to work (in THIS job market? HAH!) but I really want to be free to travel. Yet I want a home base. I WANT IT ALL!!!

I'm scheduled to be in my RV for the next six months. That may be too long ... I don't know. But we'll see how things work out.

[SeeyaGal]

I guess I am blessed with the casita and property in Yuma, no lawn to mow and we paid the next door neighbor $150.00 to water my plants for 6 months to keep them alive. Everything gets put away and locked up either in the shed or in the casita. We lock the big gates and off we go and the neighbors watch our place for 6 months. Never thought about it but till my Aunt said "Do you realize you have put down roots? The casita has a number on it!" So yep I have a Home Base for 6 months and truely love it! We call it "The Purr~Fect Retreat"

[Echo]

Frankly, it's not a good match or me, either. But my son, his wife
& stepsons are there.
I'm feeling frightened
God help me, what am I DOING? Breathe in, breathe out.

I have really been thinking about this. And I keep coming back to these lines.

I made up my mind in July '02' that I was no longer going to live my life FOR anyone but me. I moved out of TN and to ME. Left a guy in TN sitting on his azz, that I had been living with for 9yrs. In a big part because he just couldn't seem to make up his mind what or where he was going. Since then there have been bumps in my road but I have tried to live my life for me. Even now.

Kelly is with me of course but we are doing what I have wanted to do for years. My son is of course staying in TN. He has his fiancee and in October they will have their first child. I will miss David with all my heart and I will miss the birth of his first child. But my life isn't there with them. My life will be where I want it to be where I want it to go.

Being scared, afraid or frightened just might be a good thing. It might slow the process and let you make a decision that is ALL for you.
There is nothing saying that you have to live around the corner from them. For me??? I don't think I would want to live that close anyway.

[Sparkle]

AlmostThere, find the answers to your questions. Start with, What's the cheapest storage I could find? What the smallest, cheapest rig I would want to RV in? Many RV's are going for a really low price at this time. Once you have the facts, maybe you will find a way.

[Mollysmom]

Here's what we need to do - we need to start up a web site or group of some sort where we can match people up - the 2 or 3 or whatever number of people can buy a RV together then use it sort of like a time share - when they aren't in the RV they live in the house.
I've actually been thinking about something like this - I think it'd be a fun way to live, sort of a RV'er commune. I thought of either a big house or a piece of land and several cottages. Anyone like me who'd like both a house and a RV but can't afford both could "buy in" to the commune - you'd buy a "share" in the house and the RV - The household chores and upkeep would be shared as would the maintenance on the RV - I would think there'd be some sort of schedule for the RV use, maybe at the first of the year we'd draw numbers and pick our RV time based on what number we drew. If there were more then 2 people, we could even RV together (would want at least one person to be at the house)
That's my solution - anybody want in ???

[Redetotry]

Sounds like a good idea Trudy. I don't think I would really enjoy RVing alone. The summer I did it, and that was like 1992, I found people not to be very friendly and I was pretty surprised. The odd thing though was, the men who were traveling alone were treated very differently. I stayed in an RV park and worked at a local antique store and was never so lonely in my life! It was a very small town and I think they didn't like 'outsiders' but the people traveling were also not friendly, except the single men who were treated so well. I keep wondering at all the reports here about how friendly everyone is as I did not have that experience. I thought it was because I was a woman alone. But in 2002, I was with a cousin for awhile in an RV park and found it was pretty much the same. People came in, set up and disappeared inside.

Have you heard of I think they are called community housing, places around the country. They build several houses or apartments, everyone shares in chores, they have a community center with a kitchen and you can cook at home or with a group. They seem to be pretty popular and hard to find availability. Your idea sort of reminds me of these places.

[Mollysmom]

I agree that women traveling alone are treated allot different then men traveling alone - I suppose the wives think we're out to steal their husbands (gag) and the men think we're too independent for them. I suppose if I went to the type of campgrounds that had planned activities I'd meet more people, but I haven't gone to one of those yet so I don't know. It can really make me sad when I see couples or families pull into a campground and in no time at all their sitting around with other couples and families in the campground !! Doesn't happen to me !! I really hate when I see the big groups of people having the fun campfires at night and there I sit with my little grill and lonely S'more - I've only been invited to one campfire and that was a campground sponsered event.
Oh well - it's that way if you live in a stick house in a neighborhood - that's why I want the commune. Actually community living sounds better then commune

[OutandAbout]

Trudy, I think you are on to something. I would not want a large RV. I like the size of my truck camper of a B van for traveling around. I like to go out for a week or two and then have a place to come back to. The idea of sharing the chores around the homestead is interesting. I hate being away and thinking of all that has to be done upon the return. It can put a damper on traveling. Sharing a homestead can have a lot of advantages. Something to really think about.

Sorry to hijack the thread.

I think Echo is right, live your life for you, not someone else. You will have a RV and can always visit and then leave when you want/need to. It does not make sense to me to move to a neighborhood that is not desirable to you. You would definitely not be happy there and would regret your decision. How about renting the house for a year and then decide what you want to do?

Linda

[Acadianmom]

I guess it depends on how outgoing we are. My sister talks to everyone that passes or we pass. I want to crawl under a rock sometimes when she gets going. If no one is around, she talks to herself. I speak to people I meet but wouldn't invite myself to their gathering. I'm happy I found the womens club that I have camped with several times. There are planned activities and it has always been fun.

It is really hard to find someone to travel with. Someone that will get going when I want to go, every meal isn't an issue, doesn't hog the TV. Can you tell I'm getting crabby in my old age. lol My step-daughter and her friend want to take a trip with me. I have been on several day trips with them and that's about my limit.

Martha

[AlmostThere]

Trudy, you may be on to something. It would probably involve allot of legal planning as well.
One part I'd enjoy is planning trips and traveling together, but only in my own RV. I like having my own space when I need it, and I'm too anal about the upkeep of my vehicles to trust that someone else shares my same feelings.
It would be nice to know we could go off RVing and not have to worry about taking the pets, having someone pick up your mail or mow the lawn, though.
Yep, keep thinking on it!

[Getupngo]

I think I struck a chord with this thread. You all have been sooo supportive. Trudy, the RV commune is an interesting idea ... but I don't play well with others, tho' I do WORK well with others! LOL.

My experience traveling alone as a single woman has not been an isolated one. My camp-host experience has taught me how to go out and talk to other campers. I ask questions, "Are you headed out ... or heading home?" THAT is a great conversation starter. I tell people I have rig envy (when I do), and I get the story of this rig plus the ones that came before. "Are you a full-timer?" No/Yes ... they tell me about their lives & travels and/or where they live. I try to meet their dogs & talk to the women first ... they tell me stories about their husbands behind their backs. It's a lot of fun. Then I move on and talk to the next folks. The next time I walk my dogs, people smile & wave. I ask them about the fishing / boating / hike that they planned to do that day. BLAH BLAH BLAH. Uh oh. I think I would embarrass Martha.

My method of travel does include staying in one place for a several months at a time ... so I make a point of developing new friends. I do, however, have an "in" in any community I visit, because I am an AA member and there are always rooms full of people who already love me -- they just don't know it yet! I get lots of hugs & my dearest friends in my travels usually come from that source.

I DO notice that no one flirts with me when I'm on the road ... except that I get hit on by women. What does that say about how appealing strong, independent women are to men?

[Birdie]

I have found many folks traveling are very personable and ready to talk with you. And you are right, it is best if you are a single woman to talk with the woman first if it is a couple and the kids if it is a family. Oh, and if they have the dogs that is always a good conversation maker. But there has only been one time that I didn't feel like I fit right in and that was probably me as I had experienced the camping trip from Hell and wasn't in a good frame of mind. It is kind of like a new job I think, sometimes you have to be the one that waves, or goes over and asks for help. I think if you are shy it may be painful unless you are in a caravan.

Caravaning from a central area might be another possibility for those who don't want to go it alone. The central community sounds good too. I decided to sell my farm because I couldn't travel and keep the yard mowed, too. Where do you think would be a good location for a central community? I like the Casa Grande, AZ area as a possibility for wintering. Possibly Montana for summering? Maybe we develop one in several areas. Could be a good thing.

I am getting ready to head out to Mustang Island this weekend. Should be good traveling and nice weather with lots of spring migranting birds. Yep,I'll be alone but not for long.

[Bethers]

A couple notes here.

1. Sharing an rv is very, very difficult. Who pays what insurance? Where does it get stored? What happens if it needs a repair and everyone doesn't agree? What happens if the person who used it before you doesn't clean it to your specifications? Or if one has a dog that sheds a lot? You're opening a big can of worms. There are many with rv's who will not loan them to family, let alone try to share one like that.

2. In 4 years of full-timing I've had ONE incidence of someone being less friendly to me - and it was a woman who told me to stay away from her husband. After that I just HAD to find out who her husband was, and if I had really wanted to, would have gone up and flirted just to get her goat. Didn't do it - but talked to others there and it turns out she was a very, very insecure woman. I didn't see any reason to make things worse for her. Other than that one incident I've found other rvers to be basically one of the friendliest groups I've ever met. Does that mean that I like all of them or vice versa? Absolutely not. However, as a whole they are fabulous to me as a single woman.

OK - had to get those 2 things off my chest. And I don't mean that #1 couldn't be worked out - but it would be very, very difficult - worse than renting a house (which cost me money - and I rented to a friend! - and, yes, I know some of you have been very successful renting.)