Good morning ladies!
You all sound so welcoming and friendly. I am excited. I reared 4 sons and they are all grown mostly
. My last son is in his 3rd year of college and just graduated from high school(he's 18) so now that he will be living solo in an apt just off the UMN campus. I don't know about any other moms out there but I have found the 3rd year for my sons is the the year they have settled into school, have friends and are on their path to the future( this one wants to go to med school) and they don't come home more than holidays and big breaks so that is why at 52, I feel it's time.
I've been looking forward to this day for years and now that it is here, I realized I will be doing it all alone after having had so many people around me for years. I am excited but part of me wonders if I will be OK exploring by myself. I'm not afraid of the mechanics of the process and am fully capable but my life has revolved around home, hearth and rearing for almost 30 years, I don't know what to expect but I'm afraid I will just rot in this house if I don't go and am too young for that. My fears don't revolve around how capable I am but more, how alone I will be and not that someone will hurt me or take advantage, but more the loneliness.
I love to fish and picture myself learning how to fly fish but with the last one in college still and the research I've done on fly fishing, it seems like an expensive sport to get into. I also want to take golf up as I dabbled a little when the kids were younger and had a pretty accurate and powerful stroke.
I don't know any of you and maybe that is why maybe I can tell you as maybe I would have written in a diary as a youth, but I'm a little afraid of being alone and the motivation it will take to keep moving forward after so many years of doing for others. I'm not worried about safety. I think I have the appropriate respect for caution but how do I just go instead of staying in my safe bubble.
Thank you for all of your kind words. I really am so excited. I have spent the last week reupholstering the factory cushions for the dinette. I have cut down perfectly worn king sized cotton sheets to fit the little double mattress. I have washed and fluffed down and added a feather ticking to it all to mimic my mattress at home. I've shopped for everything I think I need and found some beautiful melmac dishes and sliver plate that cleaned up beautifully and feels good in my hand. I've made lace curtains and re purposed some drapes I had to recover the dinette. It feels like home, right down to the stainless steel appliances. I'm excited to take my little home away from home on the road.
I survived a pretty bad cancer and a divorce(right after the cancer treatment...out of the blue) that broke my heart but the thing I took from all of this is life is very precious and we had better not waste it. I will miss my husband on the road with me but I can make new memories. I hope you all have a wonderful day and thank you all for your kind words.