We had quite a long discussion on retirement homes here so I thought this was apropo...
[b][The Hypnotist at a Senior Home
It was entertainment night at the senior citizens' center.
After the community sing along led by Alice at the piano, it was
time for the star of the show- Claude the Hypnotist!
Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience
into a trance.
"Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time.
said Claude.
The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully
withdrew from his waistcoat pocket a beautiful antique gold
pocket watch and chain.
"I want you to keep your eyes on this watch" said Claude,
holding the watch high for all to see.
"It is a very special and valuable watch that has been in my
family for six generations" said Claude.
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while
quietly chanting
"Watch the watch --- Watch the watch ----Watch the watch"
The audience became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth.
The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its
gleaming surfaces.
A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the
gently swaying watch.
They were hypnotized.
And then, suddenly, the chain broke!!!
The beautiful watch fell to the stage and burst apart on impact"
"SHIT" said Claude.
It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizens ' Center and
Claude was never invited there again./b]