I do not full-time but I have made it to the big trip to FL category and the lets drive out way to Alaska and back group.....
Either way it has to be different from the full-timers because I know that there is still this S&B place that hold some the artwork that I haven't parted with and the fenced yard that the dogs love to run to with just an open door and no leashes...... Every time I do return it gets easier to clean out another closet or cabinet and take more bags to Goodwill....because I realize how much stuff I really am not interested in keeping...mentally and physically...
When I head off I am still reminded of that college freshman....first night in the dorm...feeling...."how am I going to do this" sort of thing. I did the same thing in the car driving towards the hospital when I went into labor for my first born...
It helps to remember that many others survive and I have a reasonable expectation to do as well or better than most. With the trip to Alaska....I really didn't think it would be real but I just kept planning and moving towards the possibility until there it was. With about a week to go, it finally dawned on me that I might pull it off and actually be able to leave Ohio behind.
Even while traveling through Canada and Alaska, it sometimes felt "out of body" as if I were watching someone else's travels because hey, did I really expect to make it all the way to Alaska...that was what other people did!
I just try to keep faith in my own abilities to survive and thrive and explore new experiences...and stay open to whatever I might find.
I had a director who questioned me when I was in my mid twenties about what my plan for my future was. He said he had his all planned out...he was a clinical psychologist
..... I knew (and know) that we are suppose to have plans because that is part of what helps us through to achieve our dreams...but...
I also realized even in my 20's that if I had been asked 5 years before where I would be 5 years in the future I could not have imagined the journey and outcome. So.....you plan and imagine your dreams and then you take a leap of faith and keep open for the possibilities that you hadn't even known to imagine...so that you might recognize then when they appear....
May be that is why so many of us refer to "Jello" plans. It is that ying/yang of life to balance the thorough planning with being able to change the plans when your instincts, mind, spirit, changes in health or life's necessities, whatever you want to call it....recognized that there might be another path to explore.
What is that quote that states that this life of ours is never a dress rehearsal...it is always the opening night...first showing...for us anyway.....so, yes, for most of us there will always be some "stage nerves".....all those words you used.....excited.... terrified....determined....curious.....
Our minds do have a wonderful ability to learn new skills and the more you travel the more some skills become "natural" or automatic...like driving a car or running errands that you run ever week... So preparing and leaving for long trips and a new way of life may get easier....Again the balance is to be able to relax and enjoy the "this is natural" and I can do this in my sleep feelings with "this is an amazing world we live in" feeling and I want to cherish as many moments of it as I can....even the seemingly mundane and everyday stuff.....
Sorry about all the words....but they just came out....