Shared Housing - another option

[JoanE]

He is much older than me with many health issues. He is not safe alone.

[Olive600]

I think these women have a wonderful situation. If all the pieces fell into place, I'd seriously think about it. They mention community, and I think that's the key. They live in "our" space, not yours or mine. I like their intention to live with...something like...respect and courtesy. I also like the idea of conserving resources. It would all depend on the others involved and the location. I like that they all have active lives and aren't dependent on each other for companionship. Their living arrangement is just one facet of their lives. They seem to be very emotionally healthy. Maybe I should keep in mind that at bottom this is a marketing video.

[Bethers]

I like that they all have active lives and aren't dependent on each other for companionship. Their living arrangement is just one facet of their lives. They seem to be very emotionally healthy. Maybe I should keep in mind that at bottom this is a marketing video.

You hit the nail on the head - they aren't doing this because they are "lonely". They are emotionally healthy and have active lives without the others. Doing this to have companionship is not, in most cases going to work. And you hit the 2nd nail with the comment that this is a marketing video.

[JoanE]

I think these women have a wonderful situation. If all the pieces fell into place, I'd seriously think about it. They mention community, and I think that's the key. They live in "our" space, not yours or mine. I like their intention to live with...something like...respect and courtesy. I also like the idea of conserving resources. It would all depend on the others involved and the location. I like that they all have active lives and aren't dependent on each other for companionship. Their living arrangement is just one facet of their lives. They seem to be very emotionally healthy. Maybe I should keep in mind that at bottom this is a marketing video.

Olive, you expressed it perfectly. However, the only thing the women market is their book which they wrote to answer the myriad questions asked of them about co-housing. Just as Beth created this web site to serve a need, they did the same but not to get rich. I believe the video is just one of many interviews they have done. They have been featured on major TV shows possibly GMA and Today.

When I met them, they shared stories with us about unexpected situations or setbacks and the methods used to deal with them. Definitely required respect, courtesy and compromise. It is becoming a huge movement. So if you were to become a Golden Girl, which one are you?

[Olive600]

I should clarify: marketing isn't always bad or predatory. I used the word to mean "getting the word out." It's also good to hear that in presentations they talk about the challenges. Which golden girl would I be? Hmmm ...I have to remember them. I'm thinking. I'm thinking... I'm a bit of each. I don't remember any of them well enough to choose one. Oh, that wasn't a serious question.

[BarbaraRose]

There were Blanche, Rose, Dorothy and Sophia.

I think I would be a little of each, a little wild part like Blanche, a little naïve part like Rose, a little logical part like Dorothy, and a sarcastic sense of humor like Sophia.

Like all relationships, communication and compromise are key (and sharing a carton of ice cream over a personal problem!)

[rvgrammy1953]

Got informed this summer that my sisters, Barb & Becky, have had a discussion about "who inherits Lori" if something should happen to Ernie... Both of them have big old farm houses with lots of room...but could I go back and live with my sisters??? Well, would have to think on that...long and hard...and will cross that bridge when and if I have to.... Hopefully, it's a long ways off.....

[JoanE]

Got informed this summer that my sisters, Barb & Becky, have had a discussion about "who inherits Lori" if something should happen to Ernie... Both of them have big old farm houses with lots of room...but could I go back and live with my sisters??? Well, would have to think on that...long and hard...and will cross that bridge when and if I have to.... Hopefully, it's a long ways off.....

my girls had a similar discussion. Something like this. "You take her." "No, you take her" Of course, they were kidding since I was right there...I think they were kidding.

[retiredhappy]

Sharon and I got along well while she was here doing her chemo and radiation however, I'm pretty much a hermit and set in my ways so I don't think I'm all that easy to live with. I think both of us are glad to have our own spaces back. We talked about living together permanently but in the end we both needed our own space.

[Acadianmom]

After my dad passed away we tried to get my mother to let my sister move their mobil home by her and them trade. My sister and her family needed more room and they would have been right next door to help mother. Mother didn't want to give up her house. My sister built a house so that was no longer an option. In less than a year mother couldn't stay by herself and we had to trade her back in forth for over a year until she had to go into a nursing home. She would have been able to stay by herself longer if she hadn't been so hard headed.

We talked about building again and I would have put a room with bath and a small kitchen in case we needed to have help. I would consider living with one of the boys but I would want my own space. After having adult children back a couple of times you find out how hard it is to live with someone. Of course children will take liberties that hopefully a roommate wouldn't.

After our house flooded we had to live with my son for 6 months. Boy that was fun. I was still working and my DH was trying to fix our place so we didn't see much of each other.

Martha

[mtngal]

I'm so surprised by the strong feelings against this idea. In other countries I guess it's much more common, especially for multi-gen families being together. My daughter and I share really well traveling and for short periods (several weeks) at home, but not sure it would work as a long term arrangement at this point. Still, I think it's a good idea and I hope it becomes more accepted some day.

[cpatinjones]

Good subject.

I have thought about getting a roomate, but always decided against it. I may try it one day.

[snowball]

When Larry died I think that my brothers and sisters thought that I would move in with my mom...right now that isn't my plan
if she gets to the stage that she needs someone there all the time well then I'll have to really thinks about it...but don't want to
be a guest in her house...meaning not having my stuff with me so that I feel like it's home...every once in awhile some of the kids will
say why don't you leave the rv down in Q for the summer and just stay with one of us...well in the first place not what I want to do...right now
not saying that it won't happen but right now I'm very content in my 5th wheel...although tonight it's very cold!!! I think to have a roommate be
it a child, mother, or friend or stranger one has to go into it with eyes open and be able to articulate well what the expectations are...and be able
to put them into writing ...just my feelings
sheila